


The Most Extraordinary

by adorkablehomestuck



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Multi, more characters/ships to come
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-29
Updated: 2014-01-29
Packaged: 2018-01-10 12:29:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1159762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adorkablehomestuck/pseuds/adorkablehomestuck
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jonathan Jacob Egbert was probably the only new kid in all of St. Skaia's Academy for Catholics. All of the students had known each other since birth, and did not have any room for John to squeeze in. The high school was the opposite of what he was looking for. While struggling to survive the dull Catholic lifestyle, an equally boring plot-twist comes into play after John walks into the wrong after-school activity room. It just so happens that the Math Club wasn't as geeky as John originally suspected. Unlikely friendships are made, untimely deaths occur, and unfortunate events are uncovered. Just the usual life of John Egbert. </p><p>|The main ship is DaveJohn, but the story doesn't revolve around it.|</p><p>TW: homosexuality, heterosexuality, minor character death, self hatred, depression</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Most Extraordinary

**Author's Note:**

> heyyy ao3 long time no see  
> so that old johndave story I have is still running, just on hiatus  
> in the meantime I have this lovely story, tme, and I am going to be committed as fuck to it. IT'S MATRIMONIAL.  
> ok ok just read ily

 

         _ **For my first thirteen years**_ , I never really gave a shit about my general conduct. In eighth grade I started to worry a little, in ninth grade the worry got worse, and by the time tenth-grade graduation rolled around, Mom had made a decision. Her first suspicion was anxiety, but I denied the false. Then she assumed that I was being bullied. I again tried to shoot down her idea, but she was set. Apparently, she used this excuse as a window to her current desire: moving. She'd never liked my high school all that much, so when she saw that I saw supposedly being bullied, she pounced on that opportunity like a tiger attacking its prey. Only my mom was feisty and determined.

        According to her, bullying leads to depression and depression leads to suicide, and there was no way she was risking her little baby's life. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS BULLSHIT. I tried to stuff the fact that I was not being bullied down my mom's throat, and that I was fine with where I was. This did not convince my mom. She was set on moving and nothing could shake her sights now. I might as well start packing up and go along with it. I'm generally fucked. Moving to a new town, going to a new school, and leaving behind the only few people that considered my existence important? Fantastic. This is basically middle school all over again, but this time everyone is ten times moodier and ten times more preppy. I'd much rather get shoved into a locker and have a gun held to my head (as if I haven't seen that happen).

        Mom never had a problem with getting what she wanted. She was really high up on the food chain. See, she's the owner of this huge baking industry. My grandma died of some weird disease that turns your skin grey when my mom was a kid, so I never met her. Mom used to joke about how when she was younger, she would call her mom a troll because of the oddly tainted skin. Her mom would always laugh and say that one day she's going to sprout horns and have a different colored blood, too. The company used to belong to my grandma, and my mom was the heiress. When she died, my mom got the throne. The Prince of Baking. Wow, and I thought I couldn't get any gayer. Anyway, my mom really has no problem with buying a new house. I'm kind of spoiled, but I try not to act the part. Sometimes I'll let a "Wow, you don't have that?" slip, but I try not to let it happen. I left her alone for ten minutes, and when I went to check on her, she had already planned three dates to look at houses and put the house on the market for a lot of numbers with a dollar sign in the front.         

       "Mom." I said flatly.         

       She looked up from her laptop and gave me that grin that said she was super excited and very pleased with herself. "John," she said airily.

        Then it sort of went downhill. Kind of like this:

        Me: What did you do?

        Mom: I think you're old enough to come house shopping with me.

        Me: I don't want to.

        Mom: You have to.

        Me: Okay.

        You see, if you were a man married to a woman, this is how every conversation went. But my dad died when I was a baby, so I think Mom uses her Woman-Power over me instead. God, Dad, why'd you have to die and pass this shit to me? Cancer just can't get enough of my damn family, can it?

        But I honestly didn't want to go house hunting. I don't like responsibility. Having to do homework every night is enough responsibility. Sometimes I think about how much my mom expects of me and I kind of just want to curl up in a ball and rock back and forth until I pass out of complete anxiety and exhaustion. I don't have a choice now, though. Damn.

        The house was huge. I estimated it was about 5,000 square feet. I wasn't too far off; it was at roughly 4,800 square feet. Jesus. My current house was 3,413 square feet exactly. I got bored so I just measured it. This house, though, was way bigger than any I've ever seen. I doubt this is the biggest Mom was looking for though.

        It's interior was gorgeous, but I'll spare the boring details. It would take a year to describe. Jesus, I'm a sucker for detail. Shut up, John, you're boring.

        I'm pretty sure Mom was dissatisfied with the house. I could hear her light "tsk" noises  at the little things she disliked. The color of the carpet, the plants on the windowsill, the master bedroom's walls.

        "God, Mom, we're getting a house for two people. Do you think we need six extra bedrooms? Why do you even care about the color of the guest room's bathroom?" I said to her.         Of course, she got that twinkle in her eye that confused the shit out of anyone. Sometimes it meant she was excited and other times it meant she thought she was the smartest person in the world. Of course, reading the context clues, I was fucked. "John, John, John, John, John, John..." Six Johns. Ugh. "I only want the best for you," Mom said gently. "so you see why we need a big house. So you can have opportunity. You can let yourself grow."

        "But it feels empty."

        Mom blinked at me. "It won't feel like that forever, sweetheart," she assured me, but she didn't seem to assure herself.

        In the end, Mom seemed to like the first one a lot more than she originally had. Maybe it was because every other house had too many faults, or maybe because she didn't want me to feel empty. That made me feel really, really good.

        The worst thing about the house was the place it was in. I grew up in Paterson, New Jersey. I was the whitest kid there, but I had friends at the school. Of course, the whole town thought I was a prick, but there were exceptions for some kids. Essex County was very white-kid friendly, on the other hand. It was one of the best places to live in New Jersey. Mom said she liked it because it isn't too far from Paterson, but still a new school system. A new life, she liked to call it. I didn't want a new life, though. I liked my life of ghetto friends and shitty education. No way in hell did I want to go to a school of uppity assholes. That school was my only option, of _course_. After getting home from the house search, I'd plopped myself in front of my laptop and researched everything about Essex County. Of course Mom liked it. It had a private school. So much for being straight.

        The school used to be an all-boys school, and only this year did they open it up to girls as well. Just my luck: a school full of asshole guys that dominate the population. I might as well walk into the place and stuff myself into a locker while simultaneously handing out my lunch money. Or maybe they'll all be perfect little Catholic boys that live only to pray and share the love of Christ.

        Aha, no.

        I mean, my social life is already shit, and I can't afford to lose the sliver of hope I have left for it. But I guess it's gone, because I'm not sticking around here.

        I leaned back in my swivel chair and sighed. Ugh. "Two fucking years," I said aloud. "and then I at least get to leave the place."

**Author's Note:**

> the next update will be longer I swear  
> expect a lot of boy-meets-world except that its dumbass-boy-meets-hot-people


End file.
